


Crazy for You

by mandykaysfic



Series: The Irish Sex Fairy Says [8]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-19
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2018-01-13 02:52:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1210018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandykaysfic/pseuds/mandykaysfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Irish Sex Fairy says: 6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive others crazy! </p>
<p>The effects of Neelix's pheremones keep him occupied.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crazy for You

He was a fine figure, even if he was the only figure of his type on board. Neelix surveyed his reflection and nodded. The carefully programmed and replicated jacket sat well across his shoulders and narrowed at his hips in a way he thought was definitely pleasing to the eye. The color suited him and he had hopes that someone else would think that way too. 

Dinner in the Mess had gone well. The usual mutterings over the color, taste and composition of the evening's offerings had been minimal, in contrast to some of his more innovative, less well-received recipes, and he'd made sure he'd been available to personally recommend and serve the dish he'd found in the data base to Mariah Henley. She would be joining those of the crew who were off-duty and free for the evening in Sandrine's, and so he would be there too. Tom Paris had been amenable to giving him some lessons in the game of pool in exchange for a home-made pie and an hour of holodeck time, and Neelix had plans to put his new skills to good use.

He had some other new skills he was also anxious to put to good use. He'd screwed up his courage and gone to Commander Chakotay for some advice. The commander had listened sympathetically and suggested some useful reading material. He'd gone back to Tom, who also directed him toward useful reading material that was considerably less clinical than the commander's recommendations. Finally, he'd sounded out the Doctor, and the EMH had actually let him practice some of the Terran techniques he'd read about in exchange for some detailed information on Talaxian sexual practices. They'd tried out those too. He really shouldn't have been so surprised at how quickly the hologram learned what made him hum. He hummed now as he settled his hair into a style that had been the latest thing in high fashion before he’d left Talax. He swivelled right then left once more, flicked an imaginary speck of lint off his collar and left his quarters with light steps.

Once in Sandrine’s, Neelix claimed one of the small tables and proceeded to chatter volubly with anyone in earshot.

“Neelix, you’re looking particularly dashing tonight.” Tom raised his glass as he stopped by. 

“Why, thank-you, Tom.”

“Are you up for a game when the table’s free? Show off what you’ve learned,” he added conspiratorially. “I haven’t told anyone. We could make a killing.”

Neelix’s gaze flickered around the room. His eyes gleamed when he spotted Mariah at the bar. She must have come in while he was talking. “I’d like that.”

Tom nodded, and moved over to sign up for a turn at the pool table. Some twenty minutes later, he waved Neelix over. Wagers continued being laid as Tom broke. 

Neelix studied the table. “Maybe…I’m not sure…how about…?” Only he and Tom knew his indecision was faked. “I think…that one there into that pocket,” and he pointed out his choice. His lip curled at Tom’s surreptitious nod and they were the only two not surprised when the six ball rolled smoothly into the side pocket. Tom won, to everyone’s secret relief, but there were only two of Neelix’s balls left on the table.

The round of congratulations warmed Neelix’s heart and he flushed with pleasure. He wasn’t so overwhelmed that he forgot his purpose in being there and made sure he was in Mariah’s group as people went back to talking. Harry playing Tom was a common enough occurrence and only the die-hard pool fans remained clustered around to watch their game. Discretion and subtlety weren’t traits people often associated with Neelix, but this night he proved himself a master of both. He managed to casually touch Mariah enough times to make him want to hum in public. When she smiled at him and rested her hand on his, he thought his heart would stop. He stammered out an invitation to join him on the dance floor, and disgraced himself when he hummed out aloud at her acceptance. He colored at her quizzical expression and fortunately remembered it was only Talaxians who hummed like that at times like this. 

He nearly hummed aloud again when he heard her humming along to the song they danced to. She smiled at him and their hands touched and they stayed there, moving to the beat until he asked her if she needed a drink. He watched her run her tongue around her lips and he beamed brightly when she breathily agreed she did. And suddenly it was easy to ask her back to his quarters where he had a bottle of something he’d traded for not so long ago.

It was blue and smooth, but half empty glasses were quickly placed aside as their lips met. Her fingers tugged at his whiskers, while his released the clip in her hair so her curls tumbled over his hands. When she hummed in his ear, Neelix almost came undone on the spot.

Later, he walked her back to her quarters. He caught the kiss she blew and enclosed it in his palm. His jaunty stride caused more than one person to smile as he hurried back to his quarters. 

 

~ 

 

Ensign Sue Brooks hurried to respond to Neelix’s urgent page. She was greeted by a cloud of smoke and Neelix’s lamentations. She worked through lunch, which now consisted of cold left-overs. When the Mess Hall finally emptied, Neelix returned to assisting her with the repairs to his main oven.

“I don’t understand it,” he repeated for the tenth time in as many minutes. 

“Not your fault,” she reassured him. She took the isolinear spanner he passed her before she asked for it. 

“Here, sit down and I’ll get you some coffee,” he said when they finally finished up.

“That would be lovely,” she sighed and passed a hand over her face.

“Oh dear.” Neelix ran his thumb over the greasy mark that now decorated her cheek. “Oops!” he exclaimed when he realised he’d only made matters worse.

Sue nodded towards Neelix’s hands and then held up her own. “I’d love a coffee but perhaps we should clean up first?”

“Yes, yes we should. Here you go.” He waved in the direction of the tiny room that opened off the kitchen. For use by the head chef to keep track of kitchen business, it contained a handy basin as well as a desk and computer terminal.

Neelix wiped his hands on his apron before getting out mugs. Out of habit he scanned the room. Satisfied nobody was watching, he removed a jar of chocolate and a tin that held home-made cookies from their hiding place. He started the coffee machine, only to have it produce a shower of sparks. He let a Talaxian curse slip from his lips just as Sue rejoined him. He blushed and apologized and was relieved when she laughed. He grabbed the isolinear spanner and held it up, a beseeching expression on his face. “I’ve got chocolate,” he offered by way of a bribe. 

“Chocolate? Real chocolate?”

“Fix my machine and I’ll make you a hot chocolate like you’ve never tasted before.”

“You’re on!” She took the spanner from him and went to work. 

She had to fetch a heating coil and while she was gone, Neelix hurried into his office and quickly cleaned himself up. Eventually, everything that had broken was working again, and Sue and Neelix both sported clean hands and faces. They sat companionably at a table. He smiled as he watched an expression of bliss cross her face as she as she inhaled the fragrant steam. When she leant back and unpinned her hair, he couldn’t stop the sharp indrawn breath he took at the sight of her red hair tumbling over her shoulders. 

“I’m off duty now,” she explained, and took a sip of her chocolate. “Oh, that’s heaven. Mmmm.” 

“It is,” agreed Neelix, but his mug remained untouched in front of him as she hummed into her drink. 

“Neelix?”

“I’m sorry. It’s just your hair…,” he trailed off. While none of the humans were as beautiful as a Talaxian, they did have qualities he found attractive. His hand reached out to touch it. He could have drawn back, but when she didn’t say or do anything, he fingered a curl that rested on her shoulder.

With her nose and mouth behind the rim of the cup and hiding her complete expression from him, he found her grey eyes held his gaze steady and he took courage from that. He slid his chair closer and stroked her hair. She said nothing, just continued to watch him over the cup until he took her hand in his and lowered it gently to the table. “Sue?”

“Neelix.”

He bent forward and smiled as she leant in to meet him halfway. 

They shouldn’t do this here in the Mess Hall, but he didn’t want to stop. He drew back, pushed his chair from the table and stood, holding out his hand. “My office?” She nodded and placed her hand in his. “Don’t leave this,” he cautioned, and picked up his mug of chocolate.

“Not likely,” she responded, and they gathered up the evidence of their presence.

 

~ 

 

“Hey, Neelix, I've got an idea for a new piece of music for the Kimtones. It needs a test audience. I wonder if you'd mind?”

Neelix gladly spent time with Harry and if they happened to do more than share music, that was fine with both of them.

 

~ ~ ~ 

 

“Neelix, Tom leant me one of his holoprograms. I wondered if you’d like to try it out with me?” Gerron had found Neelix sitting alone, watching the stars in one of the observation lounges.

“It’s not Captain Proton?”

“No, he keeps that for himself and Harry. He said it’s a fairground. Carnival rides and things, you know.”

“Well, it sounds as though it would be fun.”

“I have some time reserved now if you’re free.”

“Let’s go then.”

It was Tom’s programming at its best. After wearing themselves out on the Heartstopper, the Anti-Gravitron, the Cyclorama and fast and furious rides as well as scaring themselves silly on a most superior ghost train, they found themselves on the Ferris wheel. The stars competed with the bright lights of the fairground, the pre-programmed nightfall signalling their time would be up in twenty minutes.

Neelix waved his arm, encompassing the scene below. “Wonderful, isn’t it?” He turned when Gerron shifted closer. Gerron’s emotions were easy to read as he examined the hopeful expression in the dark brown eyes, the nasal ridges so different to his own and the soft-looking lips that trembled a little. The little gondola swayed in the breeze as the big wheel paused to allow on some holographic patrons. A romantic soul at heart, Neelix easily succumbed to the atmosphere and kissed Gerron with pleasure until the ride came to an end when their time was up.

As they exited the holodeck, Neelix invited Gerron to his quarters to compare and contrast the anatomy of Talaxians and Bajorans, to which Gerron agreed with alacrity and Neelix spared a moment to bless the Doctor for his tutoring. Neelix fairly hummed with anticipation.

 

~ 

 

He could feel the Vulcan watching him, but every time Neelix turned in Tuvok's direction, Tuvok's head was bent over the reports he'd chosen to read in the Mess Hall. Neelix pondered on Tuvok's presence for a while, but when Chell mentioned sharing some traditional Bolian recipes he forgot the intense, dark eyes soon enough.

 

~ 

 

“Hello, Neelix.” Jenny Delaney, and it was indeed Jenny, greeted Neelix with drawn out syllables and a sultry smile. 

“Jenny Delaney, a fine afternoon to you.”

“You knew it was me.”

“I know every member of the crew. You can’t fool me.” Neelix continued the never-ending chore of cleaning the tables in the Mess as he answered. 

“I wasn’t trying to,” pouted Jenny. “I wanted you to know it was me.” She leant forward and smoothed her hair.

Neelix stopped wiping for a moment and then furiously cleaned the same place for a moment.

“So, did you have any plans for this evening?” she asked, using the sultry drawl that sent shivers along his spine.

“Ah, I had considered going to the Resort. Why?”

“I wondered if you—”

“Would go to the Resort with you?” interrupted Neelix hopefully.

“Well, actually, I wondered if you’d like to have dinner with me. Megan’s going to the Resort so you could come over to our quarters. We won’t be interrupted. Of course, it would be just a replicated meal, but I thought you could use a break from cooking.”

“Now that’s very thoughtful. Very thoughtful indeed. I’d love to have a meal with you.”

Several hours later, Neelix placed his fork on his now empty plate. Jenny had chosen a spicy dish loaded with a multitude of brightly colored vegetables and had even replicated enough extra spices for Neelix’s serving to satisfy his Talaxian palate. He helped her take the plates away, and then she ordered the computer to play the background music a little louder.

“Dance with me, Neelix.” She held out her hand.

“I, I don’t….”

“Shh. All you have to do is hold me and sway in time to the music.”

So he took her in his arms and they swayed. Jenny buried her face in the side of his neck and inhaled. “Mmm. You smell so good,” she murmured. Her breath tickled his ear as they turned slowly in a circle. One hand left her hip and he stroked her along spine, feeling the gentle play of her muscles. One singer after another crooned words of love into the room. Neelix’s arms tightened around her as she hummed along to the tune. He hummed too, his whole body vibrating with pleasure. “Make love with me, Neelix,” she begged after a while, and tugged him toward the bedroom.

 

~ 

 

“Mmm, you smell so good.” It wasn't the first time Neelix had heard those words, and if the voice confused him momentarily, then he thought he could be forgiven as he shared a bubble bath with Megan Delaney.

 

~ 

At the Resort Tom Paris dismissed the Talaxian hologram and took over Neelix's foot massage. He said he needed the practice as the Doctor had him learning physical therapy as part of his training. Tom's hands on his feet were almost enough to start him humming on the spot, so he made no demur when Tom needed to work on more than his feet. From the corner of his eye he saw Tuvok sitting at the table where the chess board was and he wondered even as Tom pulled on his arm that Tuvok sat alone.

 

~ 

 

“I would like it very much if you would spend this day of shore leave in my company.” Ensign Mia Jurot of the science department issued her invitation to Neelix. “There are a number of native markets to visit and the gardens are said to be very beautiful.”

Neelix smiled and accepted Mia’s invitation. Life of Voyager was good. He no longer missed Kes or Talax. 

She slipped her hand into his as they strolled down a shady path on the latest planet. “You are happy, Neelix. I feel it. I feel you. Empathic,” she explained.

He nodded. He’d forgotten she wasn't human; there was little to distinguish her from them. He squeezed her hand. “I think you're happy as well.”

“Yes, I am.” They smiled at one another. “Look!” A pair of brightly colored birds fluttered above their heads and then darted amongst the trees, calling to one other or maybe others of their species. “I think they're happy too.”

“They have a beautiful place in which to be happy,” said Neelix and he thought he might have a touch of empathy himself as he felt an urgency he was sure did not all originate within himself. Together they stepped off the path and into each other's arms.

The urgency built in both of them. Neelix made to pull back, to slow things down, but she laughed softly and whispered in his ear, “There's nobody else here. I would sense them. Come, we will be out of sight behind those trees.” She ran a finger down his nose and across his lips. “Don't be embarrassed. Enjoy the extra thrill.” Her black eyes gleamed with equal measures of mischief and desire. And the normally quiet and unassuming ensign took him into herself and the birds sang as they both hummed.

 

~ 

 

It was late when Neelix put down the PADD Lieutenant Torres had loaned him. He'd borrowed several engineering modules and found a work of fiction amongst them that had obviously been accidently included. It proved more entertaining, particularly after a long day. He decided he would take his thoughts of the activities shared between an Andorian scientist and a human pilot to his room where he could adapt some of them for a Talaxian and a rather intriguing personal aide he purchased on the previous shore leave. The door chime was actually more than a little unwelcome, even though he usually loved company. “Enter,” he called and if his tone was terse, it wouldn’t be obvious to the person on the other side of the door. “Mr Tuvok!” he exclaimed. The security officer was the last person Neelix expected.

“Mr Neelix. I hope I am not calling at an inopportune time.”

“No, no. Come in. May I get you a drink?”

“No. Yes. Tea would be acceptable. Thank you.”

Neelix wondered at Tuvok’s confusion and replicated the Vulcan’s preferred blend. He ordered tea for himself as well and waved Tuvok to a seat.

“What can I do for you?” He peered curiously through the steam. Tuvok seemed…agitated. He listened as Tuvok expressed his opinions as to Neelix’s reliability, discretion, his loyalty to Voyager and her crew and his outstanding abilities as morale officer, all of which was flattering to Neelix, but didn’t provide him with the slightest clue as to Tuvok’s purpose in visiting him. 

And finally, with some delicate questioning on Neelix’s part, Tuvok spilled the beans. “The Doctor has informed me that while Talaxians and Vulcans are biologically incompatible, they are able to achieve sexual satisfaction in the manner necessary to assuage the Pon Farr. As we will not be looking to reproduce, the biological constraints are irrelevant.”

“Oh.”

“I have observed you for some time. Humans, Bolians, Bajorans, Betazoids – you have satisfied them all.”

“Well, yes, naturally, but why not ask one of your friends, someone that you’ve known for longer?”

“Know this; I find myself incontrovertibly, surprisingly strongly drawn to you and while I acknowledge the role pheromones play in this attraction, I find it does not trouble me in the least, for all the reasons I have already provided. If you are agreeable, I thought we could get in some practice now, before I am unable to control myself.”

“Practice?” Neelix needed only microseconds to decide that practice was a very good thing. There were some techniques he hadn’t had a chance to try for real. He put his cup down. “My place or yours?” he enquired, and remembering that Vulcans were touch telepaths, he concentrated on the business at hand and decided to think about the truth of the adage the more sex one had, the more one would be offered at a later time.

END


End file.
